Good afternoon.
Today, I just feel like I should pour my feelings and thoughts out, somewhere. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I felt this empty. Yes, on the outside I seem preoccupied and distracted. But that's because I'm just trying to forget about the thoughts that lurk at the corner of my mind.. Like somewhere dark. Honestly speaking, I have no idea how I am ever going to get over you. Yes, we were just friends, but what we had, like I've said time and again, is far more than anything I can ever imagine of. Maybe I'm not making sense, but that's just the whole idea of me penning down everything I have in my mind. Like I've sad before, what we had was far beyond a boyfriend-girlfriend thing. Every single time I question my decisions and actions, I have to remind myself of the pain that I went through last year, and how it is everything I fear. Maybe it's just inevitable that I can never be in anything close to a relationship. Maybe I'm just better off alone. The thing is, I kinda was, for the past 2/3 years. But with you around, I never needed anyone else. Never had a boyfriend, and I didn't need one. Why did things have to go so wrong? I keep myself busy, just so that I wouldn't have the time to ponder about all these things. But oh well, they say you can't keep running away right? Day after day I miss you.. and I wonder if I will ever be able to open up to someone else, like how I did with you. But I'm just too afraid. Philophobia at it's peak.
Abrupt. But I don't want to go any further with my thoughts. Bye.
